Willing to Compromise

Boy Blue called me the day after we first met to ask if I would accompany him to his sister's out-of-town wedding in a few weeks. He said wanted to give me adequate time to buy a dress, if needed, and didn't want to extend a last-minute invitation.

I told him we could discuss it on our next date (which, after consulting our calendars for a mutually agreeable evening, we determined couldn't be for another week and a half).

In the meantime, we started emailing throughout the work day, and I ended up suggesting we get together for lunch, since we work near one another. We compromised on the time, and I picked the place. He met me right on time (love it), and we sat down for a decent lunch with a side of really awesome, kind of intense conversation.

I have never known a guy who communicates so openly. Nothing is off-limits, it seems. We ventured further down What I'm Looking For Road, with detours through What I'm Like in a Relationship Alley and What I Don't Want in a Partner Lane.

I'll sum it up like this: I think we're moving toward the same page.

I told him again that I want to date and that, while the possibility of a relationship is not completely out of the question, I'm not necessarily looking for one right now. I divulged my lack of experience in a significant (let alone healthy) relationship and reiterated my fear of commitment. He took it all in, asking pertinent questions and just generally drawing more out of me.

He volunteered an acceptable explanation of the multiple out-of-town invites. (He doesn't believe you really know a person until you travel with them, with which I wholeheartedly agree.)

And that brought us back to his five-date agenda. Those first five dates should be enough time, he holds, to determine most (if not all) levels of interest and compatibility. That includes the travel (again, hence the invites) and, of course, sexual compatibility.

Which is kind of a problem for me. Because, see, I've pretty much just jumped right into the sack with all the guys in my (big air quotes here) romantic past. And I've decided it pretty much just complicates things... Fosters emotions that I'm not sure would be there had I waited it out... Completely and utterly confuses me.

(So, there, I just admitted it: Belle cannot have sex like a guy.)

So... I asked how he felt about waiting for sex. His immediate reaction was of the no-way variety. But as I explained myself and my reasoning, I could see a visible change in his expressions and demeanor. By the end of it, he was assuring me he would never pressure me into sex and throwing his five-date agenda out the window. He's decided, he said, that I'm worth getting to know.

He told me he'd like me to be his girlfriend*, and that he was willing to let me take the time I need to decide if that's what I want, too.

So now I'm here trying to sort it all out.

• Is dating around more important to me than a relationship right now?
  
• Are the warm fuzzies I'm beginning to feel really for him, or does his professing to like me so much make me like him more?
• Is he the only guy on the planet who communicates like this? ('Cause, let me tell you, if so... I'ma have to snag him up.)
• Will I be able to keep my freaking legs closed until I sort it all out?
  

These are some of the questions that plague me...

* In future tense... he hasn't technically asked. Yet.