It's All Over: Goodbye NRA Guy

As promised, I made plans for every part of the weekend so NRA Guy couldn’t squeeze me in at his convenience and, let’s face it, so I’d be having plenty of fun if and when he did decide to call me. Unfortunately, my Friday night plans included a girl friend coming over and spending the night, and I didn’t think to get my parking pass from NRA when he left after spending the night earlier in the week.

Even though I really didn’t want to make first contact on the day the girl arrived in town, I texted him around 9:30 and told him I needed it back so my friend wouldn’t get towed. Below is how that played out (spelling errors, IM speak, and all).

Belle: Hey, my friend is here. I really need my parking pass so she doesn’t get towed.
NRA: I totally forgot im sorry.im wasted though
Belle: At home? We’ll come by. You can bring it out to me. Or if you aren’t home now, we’ll come by when you get there.

About an hour later, NRA called. First he asked if there was anywhere else my friend could park. The answer is no. Then he said he was at his house then but was about to leave for Best Buddy’s house. I asked if he was leaving immediately. He said in about 25 minutes. I asked if he could make it 35 so we could get to his house before he left. (If he had returned my last message without the hour delay, my friend and I would have already been back from picking up the pass.) He started with the, “It’s the girl’s first night in town and a bunch of people are waiting and they’re nearly ready to go and I don’t want to hold everyone up.” He was talking, but I was thinking, “lies, lies, lies.” I said fine, bitterly wished him a good night while directing every negative vibe I could muster his way, and hung up.

The following texts span the next couple hours.

NRA: Im sorry. ill give it to u tom. guess im a dissapointment
Belle: Over and over.
NRA: Alright, im sorry. u dont have to deal with me anymore

This, in my opinion, was the end. Note that he said it, not me.

Belle: Well, I do have to get my parking pass back.
NRA: Ill bring it to u tom
Belle: Great. You can put it through the mail slot. I’ll be out.
NRA: Ok

After this message, Belle gathered all the things NRA Guy had given her (including the fucking toothbrush he bought her but said she couldn’t leave at his house) so she could leave them outside for him to pick up if he actually delivered the pass as promised. She also deleted his number from her cell.

NRA: I didnt want things to end like this but I understand
Belle: Well, you’re the one who ended it. I have ideas, but I can’t say I understand.

Much later that night…

NRA: I didnt end anything. im just not willing to fight any more for 2^nd or 3^rd place
Belle: What?! Bullshit! You know you’re the only one I’ve been seeing. This is about you fucking up. Not me.
NRA: Ok
Belle: Yeah. Ok.

The next morning, after some encouragement from the roommate, I sent NRA the message below.

Belle: And really, since you blew me off any time your friends were around, I was the one competing for 2^nd or 3^rd place.

He never responded, of course. And, of course, he didn’t return the parking pass as he said he would. And, of course, the Roommate’s boy toy’s car was towed when he visited that night.

I informed NRA of the tow and told him I’d be over to pick up the pass. He returned my things, I returned his, and we said very little to one another. (He didn't even mention the towing.)

It can't get much more officially over than exchanging things with someone.

I predict one of two things will happen. The first option is that I’ll never hear from NRA again. The second is that he’ll wait a few weeks (or months), until the bowl games are over and/or the girl leaves, then he’ll get trashed one night and call me. I’ll keep you updated.*

Before all this went down, all of you, dear friends, were telling me I deserved better. That I should write him off and move on. I was holding out and trying to give him another shot. Part of me thought bringing back trust would be impossible. Part of me really wanted to see if he could make up for his bad, bad behavior (and, let’s face it, how he behaved with the girl there).

You were right. I was wrong. (See? I can admit such things.)

I’m thinking the next go-round might involve letting you guys decide who the worthy ones are. I seem to be terrible at making those kinds of choices. I’m rounding up a committee to weigh in on my dating decisions. So far, the membership is at three. I'd like perhaps a couple more voices, so if someone can't respond I'll still have a few opinions to work with.

If you have suggestions for how the committee should work or want to be included, send me an e-mail. I'll post more on this later.


* I got another text from NRA just before posting this. It said: "I don't want to fight, I just want to apologize for the way things happened, and wish u the best"
After conferring with several Committee members, I have decided the best course of action is no response. (I maintain my prediction that he'll contact me after bowl games, the girl's departure, and/or Valentine's Day. I think this text is the first step at smoothing things over so when he does contact me it will be easier to get back in my good graces.)